On black male patriarchy.

Black male patriarchy is a motherfucker. Maybe because so often so many black men deny their own misogyny toward black women. The notion that black women are responsible for the destruction of black families, black homes and the emasculation of black men is rooted in a deep hatred and disdain of black women, female power and agency. There is really no other explanation. At the same time that black women are denigrated, patriarchal black males deflect attention from themselves and deny any responsibility for the sexism that helps to beat down black women. To further deny culpability patriarchal black men iterate the strong black woman mythos as a testament to what black women have endured against all odds. Yet they stop short of acknowledging that much of what black women endure is the shit patriarchal black men flung at them. By this refusal to acknowledge the depth of the pain black women feel from their own black men, patriarchal black  have again demonstrated that they do not love or respect black women.

To patriarchal black men, black women are here to service them sexually on demand, feed the children they have, bring home money to help support your lifestyle, keep their house clean and be submissive. While patriarchal black men are proclaiming that they are the "kings of their castle," they are busy abdicating their patriarchal dictated responsibilities (like financially supporting their family for instance).

Over the last couple of days, #blackpowerisforblackmen has been trending and has been a way for black women to vocalize the sexism and misogyny they are subjected to from black men on a daily basis. It was a cathartic experience watching the stories of black women from varying backgrounds unfold on the screen. And yet patriarchal black men had to step in with the bullshit. But they also didn't tell us anything we didn't already know about them. Those who have power, no matter how much or little, are loathe to give it up. And oppressing of others is a very cheap way to empower oneself but feels and appears to very effective.

So patriarchal black men can kick rocks. They can kiss my ass. They can go to hell. There is real work to done because these battles are real and no one has time for foolishness. Thus, my new mantra: Do your work or get the fuck out of the way.